Tuesday, November 1, 2011
I remember the nerves.....thinking to myself, "Oh dear God! What am I doing? I have no clue what I am supposed to do? I am only 25 years old!!" Yes, those were just a few thoughts that I had the night I walked into Eliza Coffee Memorial Hospital 10 years ago today. You see, I became a mommy that day and I was scared out of my mind!! My dream, as a little girl, was to grow up and meet my prince charming. We would have three children and I would stay home to take care of them while he went off to work during the day. We would have the "Leave it to Beaver" type home and family. LOL!!!!! The things we dream of as children are quite hilarious. Well, my dream came true on November 1, 2001, as I looked down into the eyes of a blue eyed princess straight from heaven. Somehow when I looked down into those eyes God erased all my fears and replaced them with an abundance of love. I didn't want her out of my sight! Even the nurses at the hospital would beg to take her to the nursery just so I could get some rest. My answer every time was a quick, "no". The first 2 years she was stuck to my hip and we did everything together. Now my blue eyed princess is 10 years old and this morning she walked out of my house in a quick sprint to the car so she could make it to school on time. My heart melted as she turned around and told me bye and a quick, "I love you mom!" My dad would always say, "they step on your toes when they are younger but on your heart when they are older." That is so very true! She no longer steps on my toes but can cause my heart to skip a beat when she looks across a room and gives me a quick smile. When she hugs me a tear swells up in my eye each time. That girl will someday (when she has my amazing grandchildren) will know how much the small looks, smiles, and "I love yous!" mean. I could go on and on about her and how awesome I think she is.:) I mean, I am her mom.:) My heart is overflowing with love and thankfulness today! Thank you dear sweet Jesus for making me a mother, not just of three children like I dreamed of as a child, but of four amazing beautiful little people!! I LOVE being their mother!!! Faith, I am so proud to be called your mother! Today is your special day and these have been the best 10 years of my life!!!! I can't wait to see what God has in store for you!!! Go get em' girl!!!!
So, where do I begin?? I haven't posted in awhile due to several circumstances. I spent much time cleaning around the house October 22-23 preparing for a visit from my parents. I was so excited to see them because it had been several months since our last visit. Plus, this was our first visit since my parents had moved from Florence, AL, to Imboden, AR. LLLLOOONNNGGG Way away!!! Anyway, I was super excited for them to get here and just spend time hanging out and catching up on life. We were enjoying our visit when I received a very unexpected phone call from my husband on Wednesday afternoon (October 26th). My heart sank down to my stomach as my husband told me that a dear, sweet friend of ours was very sick. This friend was not like any other friend, he was more like a grandfather or a very close uncle. This man was one of those people that you look at in awe because of his wisdom, humility, compassion, forgiving spirit, giving heart, etc. and seriously question yourself..."how can I be more like that?" He was a walking depiction of everything I believe a Christian should manifest to the world. His name was Louis E. Cottrell, Jr. and I deeply loved that man! I got the honor of getting to know him through my husband and his family. I began dating my husband my senior year of high school and noticed Mr. Louis being around a lot. He was so much fun!!! I always loved being around him!! I loved hearing him laugh...he had the BEST laugh! And then he would open his mouth to sing and it was like heaven came down and entered the room. I have so many memories of his sweetness. Now, I don't have as many memories as my husband, but the ones I do have I will hold onto dearly. Mr. Louis taught me how to properly cut a steak and how to order it so that it would taste its best. He provided two very young lovebirds (who were completely broke) an amazing honeymoon adventure and then a place to live (in his basement) for almost five years. He was always there!!! And now...he is not! Mr. Louis passed away from this earth very quickly the morning of October 27th but he will not be forgotten! As we attended his visitation and funeral arrangements we were reminded of his humble ways. He had so much to brag about but chose not too. He truly was a man of honor! Mr. Louis was a man of respect, integrity, compassion, and love. I will forever miss him but I bet he is having a blast right now! I can see him singing, enjoying blending his amazing tenor voice with other beautiful voices in heaven. I enjoyed my five hour trip back home yesterday listening to funny memories my husband had made over the years with Mr. Louis. Mr. Louis, my heart can never thank you enough for all you did for me and my family! I can never thank you enough for the influence you had on me and my husband! I pray that your laughter, wisdom, humility, compassion, forgiving spirit, and giving heart will be carried on throughout the years by all the people you touched. We love you Mr. Louis!!!!